MOTIVATION SONG....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s1XozsBN5Z4

KELLY ROWLAND MOTIVATION IS HOTTTT AND IS GETTING ME THREW ALOT RIGHT NOW THE SONG IS GIVING ME ALOT OF PUSH AND I LOVE IT....

PHOTO SHOOT BY SAM D...

THESE ARE SOME SHOTS I DID WITH SAM IN MARCH NOT POSTING THEM ALL AT ONCE LOL .. XOXO

THE START...

WELL LET THE START OF MY LIFE WHICH I HAVE IN CONTROL BEGIN. WITH A LITTLE BIT OF PUSH AND FAITH AND A GREAT TEAM I WAS READY TO DO WHAT I HAD TO DO.. THE FIRST PHOTO SHOOT I DID WAS AMAZING AND I FELT LIKE IT WAS WHERE I NEEDED TO BE. THE RED CARPET EVENTS I WENT TO WAS HEAVEN. THE NEW LOOK I GOT WAS NEEDED FOR ME.. I WAS SO HAPPY AND WAS READY.. OMG IT HIT ME (THAT IS WHAT MY MANAGER WAS TALKING ABOUT) ME BEING READY.. IT WAS MY TIME AND I WAS READY TO DO EVERYTHING I NEEDED TO DO TO START.. THE NEW LIFE I HAVE WITH HELPING MYSLEF IN MY TALENTS AND HELPING OTHERS WHO HAVE BEEN THREW THE SAME THING I WENT THREW AND WHAT IM GOING THREW NOW. THE STRUGGLE OF SOMEONE WHO IS A REAL PERSON MAKING IT TO THE TOP....

PICKING UP THE PIECES.....

SO AS I GAINED MY FAITH AND HOPE BACK I STARTED TO FEEL LIKE I WAS PICKING UP THE PIECES.. PIECES OF SOMEONE WHO HAS BEEN BROKEN BEFORE AND BEEN THREW THE HURT. I NOTICED THAT I WASN'T HURT JUST THIS ONCE, I MEAN I HAVE BEEN THREW THIS MANY TIMES BEFORE ,HURT OF COURSE..IT IS JUST SOMTHING THAT HAPPENS IN LIFE AND YOU JUST HAVE TO GAIN YOUR FAITH BACK AND PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER. WITH THE HELP OF GOD, YOURSELF, FAMILY AND FRIENDS IT CAN HAPPEN. I MEAN IT WAS HARD BUT I WAS DOING IT.. I WAS READY TO DO WHAT I HAD TO DO AND I WASNT GONNA LET ANYONE OR ANYTHING STAND IN MY WAY OF TRYING TO BRAKE ME OR BRING ME DOWN..THE QUESTION WAS HOW TO GET BACK IN THE GAME.. FUNNY THINGS ABOUT QUESTIONS IS THAT THEY ALWAYS HAVE ANSWERS AND MY ANSWER TO MY QUESTION WAS IN FRONT OF ME THE WHOLE TIME...

HOPE...

SO AFTER TALKING TO MY MANAGER IT HIT ME.. I WAS READY.. WE TALKED ABOUT STARTING OVER AND BRANDING MYSELF INTO SOMETHING MORE THEN JUST A FACE... IT GAVE ME HOPE TO KNOW THAT THERE WAS A LIGHT AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL..I KNEW THERE WAS SOMETHING THAT I WANTED TO DO WITH MY TALENT JUST HAD TO GET IT IN ORDER. I MEAN BEING A MODEL, MAKE UP ARTIST, ACTOR, AND DANCER WASN'T ENOUGH, I WANTED MORE AND THAT MORE WAS TO USE MY TALENTS TO HELP OTHERS..BUT HOW WAS THE QUESTION? SOONER OR LATER I WAS GONNA FIGURE IT OUT...THREW ALL OF THE HURT I THOUGHT I WOULD FAIL, BUT ALL I HAD TO DO WAS BELIEVE IN ME. I GOT MY FAITH BACK AND IT GAVE ME THE COURAGE TO KNOW THAT I REALLY CAN DO IT. NOT ONLY THAT I CAN DO I WAS GONNA DO PERIOD.. NO ONE OR NOTHING WAS GONNA STOP ME OR STAND IN MY WAY FROM MAKING IT TO THE TOP...

EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON...

BEING ENGAGED AND HAVING A LIFE THAT I HAVE ALWAYS WANTED AND DREAMED OF I DIDNT EXPECT TO BE BACK TO SQUARE ONE. THREW THE HURT ,THE DRAMA AND EVEN GOING INTO A DEPRESSION, I KNEW PICKING MYSELF BACK UP WAS GONNA BE HARD TO DO...ALL I KEPT ASKING MYSELF WAS WHAT AM I GONNA DO? GOING OUT WAS FAR FROM MY MIND,I MEAN I MISSED HIM I MISSED US... SO ONE NIGHT IN NYC I WENT OUT WITH SOME FRIENDS AND ONE OF THEM SAID OMG YOUR SO SKINNY (IN THE BACK OF MY MIND IM LIKE DUH IM SAD) BUT I SAID REALLY?. I WAS LETTING MY SELF GO AND DIDNT KNOW OF A WAY OUT AND NEEDED AN ESCAPE OUT OF THIS SADNESS FAST. SO ONE DAY I GOT A CALL FROM MY MANAGER AND HE WAS LIKE HEY WE NEED TO TALK AND I TOLD HIM WHAT HAPPEN AND HE SAID LOOK IN THE MIRROR AND TELL ME WHAT DO YOU SEE? I SAID SOMEONE WHO IS LOST AND HE SAID REALLY CAUSE THE PERSON IM TALKING TO IS SOMEONE THAT IS READY...

I JUST DIED...

WHO WOULD OF THOUGHT I WOULD BE BACK IN NYC? I DIDNT! I THOUGHT I HAD IT ALL FIANCE THE LOVE OF MY LIFE HOUSE A CAR AND A GREAT JOB, BUT SOMETHING WAS MISSING... ME!.I NEVER THOUGHT GIVEN YOUR ALL WOULD SLAP YOU IN THE FACE WHEN YOU WASNT LOOKING BUT IT DID TO ME. BEING HURT WAS THE BEST THING TO HAPPEN TO ME IN A LONG TIME. I THOUGHT NOTHING COULD BE MORE PERFECT UNTIL IT HIT ME MY BDAY OF THIS YEAR. THE PERSON THAT LOVED ME FOR ME AND I THOUGHT I WAS GONNA MARRY SAID THAT HE WASNT READY AND THAT IT WAS OVER AFTER COMING OUT TO HIS FAMILY AND FRIENDS. GETTING MY NAME ON HIS BODY DIDNT STOP HIM FROM SAYING THOSE WORDS I NEVER THOUGHT I WOULD OF HEARD...IT'S OVER...IT HAPPEN AND THATS WHEN I THOUGHT I LOST IT ALL....